Zuihitsu #29

I am tired of standing between other people and death.

I am tired of saying, “If you need me anytime, just give me a call.” Because when they call, I am tired of saying, “Please don’t kill yourself today.”

I am tired of staring people in the eyes, hoping I will see them the next day because there is no guarantee my words will carry them through the storm – no guarantee because nothing can guarantee life, and yet…

Promise me I will see you tomorrow, I said.

They smiled, nodded through their tears. They promised.

They promised. Tomorrow came, and they weren’t there, and I…

I am tired.

But what else, what more can I do?

Nobody wants to stand where I stand, but someone has to. We need people here, at the edge of the cliff, people who can create a safety net to catch those who are about to fall –

And sure, the net breaks sometimes. Sometimes the net itself needs saving. But we need it to be there in the first place.

Now more than ever, we need to look out for each other. We have to take care of one another.

Because who among us is strong enough to continue alone?

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